Are you miserable at work? Fed up with workplace conflict that undermines morale and lowers productivity?
Frustrated because the same old issues keep pushing your buttons – and you find yourself reacting the same old way?
I can almost hear the thundering chorus of “YES!”
But guess what? You CAN overcome these problematic situations.
In what’s become one of my most popular courses, Navigating Difficult Situations in the Workplace, I help you recognize your hot buttons and show you how to better respond – and to de-escalate triggering situations as they happen. See what you’ll learn and register right here.
You won’t be hearing been-there, tried-that strategies that don’t work.
You’ll only hear proven strategies that will help you resolve unproductive tension and conflict BEFORE it undermines your organization.
And that’s something you can’t afford to miss out on. Here are some highlights…
The First Step in Overcoming Workplace Conflict
You start on first base to reach home plate. That means: Start with yourself.
- What triggers you?
- What are your HOT buttons?
When you enroll in my Navigating Difficult Situations in the Workplace course, I’ll provide a list of questions asking you how triggered you would feel (positive or negative) regarding specific situations that might occur, such as:
When Someone (Colleague, Supervisor, etc):
- Takes over as you are leading a meeting or presentation
- Takes all the credit for your work
- Is controlling, rude, or judgmental
- Doesn’t meet your expectations, or fails to meet a key deadline
Once you identify your triggers, writing down your reaction is important. You’ll soon see that your reactions can’t be blamed on anyone’s behavior, or by simply saying “He made me angry!”
Truth is, you’ve been carrying around these ‘emotional hot buttons’ a long time.
But guess what? You don’t have to. You CAN take back your power – and CHOOSE how you WANT to respond.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
Why Your Hot Buttons Are Pushed (and What to Do)
Current situations can reactivate memories from our past. If we don’t feel resolved about past situations, it’s as if we display them on our bodies like “buttons” that others can push. That’s why we react the same way – over and over.
Fear also causes us to respond ineffectively. A useful tool, the “Ladder of Fear,” can help you search for deeper issues, all of which can lead to unwanted workplace conflict if they’re left unresolved.
Here’s what to do. Ask yourself: “So if this fear were to come true, then what else am I afraid could happen?”
Some common scenarios might include:
- Letting others (and/or yourself) down
- Being seen as incompetent or “not good enough”
- Damaging a relationship permanently
- Making the wrong decision
- Fearing things could escalate or get out of control
- Showing others a perceived vulnerability
Write down your responses to gain a deeper insight into your reactions. You might be surprised what you discover about yourself through this simple exercise.
Just as fear triggers us, unmet needs do as well. When we don’t feel respect or acknowledged, that, too, can push our buttons. And our ego – always wanting to be seen as perfect and the BEST – hampers our reactions.
Change Your Story, Change Your Reaction
We make up stories all the time.
One morning I suddenly awoke and felt extremely anxious because my alarm did not go off. Panic set in. I was late!
Then I put my glasses: Relief! I had misread the clock – it was actually two hours earlier than I thought! The clock hadn’t changed – MY INTERPRETATION did!
Can you relate?
This may be a simple example, but it shows you how you can change YOUR story and as a result, change your reaction.
You’re thinking you can’t change your story? You can! Here is one example:
When you think:
You are such a *&^^% for interrupting me!
You can shift your thoughts to:
I don’t appreciate his timing, but at least he is willing to engage in this dialogue.
He seems to have a lot of energy about this topic, so maybe he has some good ideas to add.
Maybe there’s something that I can learn from this.
You Can Make Different Choices – and Recover When You Mess Up
Intentions are just like using GPS: you have to know your destination.
If you choose unproductive thoughts and intentions, you’ll likely react in ways you’ll regret. If you choose productive thoughts and intentions, you’ll likely respond more effectively in difficult situations – and more likely to achieve positive results.
And be real. We ALL MAKE MISTAKES.
In my Navigating Difficult Situations in the Workplace course, I’ll show you how to practice different ‘recovery skills” to help you rebuild what may have been damaged when you responded negatively to a triggering situation. Soon, you’ll be resolving unproductive conflict (and inspiring others to do the same) with greater ease and confidence.
Heal Your Intrapersonal Roots, Redesign Your Life
You lose so much of your time, energy, and organizational capital when you over-react and mismanage difficult situations. It doesn’t have to be that way.
How many can relate to this story:
I was tired from finishing my presentation at 3 a.m. and was still getting over the flu. I didn’t have it in me to pause or give myself time to think – so when someone questioned my research and project, I SNAPPED, raised my voice with the intention to PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE.
I can show you proven tools to deactivate the power of old issues that fuel your triggered reactions so you can respond more effectively. Find out how you can transform your work environment when you enroll in one of my top courses, Navigating Difficult Situations in the Workplace.
And don’t forget to share this resource with your colleagues so as many folks as possible can benefit…We could all use as many fresh, innovative tips and tools as possible to transform workplace conflict and unproductive dynamics!
You can redesign your life to bring you – and others – respect, dignity, and greater fulfillment .
“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.”